I have finally left Ireland and have just arrived in Italy...and you know what?...I miss Ireland. I miss the friends I've made, the town of Ballyvaughan and it's 250 people, the cows... Well I miss it because I have come to know it so well is all... Rome is so overwhelming compared to my little town in Burren, congrats to Lisa for surviving such a crazy place and for showing us such amazing videos of her travels through Italy. I hate coming to the end of this J.Y.A. project, it's been such a wonderful motivator over these past 4 months, and I can't believe the time is already gone.
At this point, I'm supposed to say that my life has changed; that it was an experience of a lifetime, and it's helped me to find myself...and it has. You go into these situations full knowing that you will be different when you're done...you just don't know how you will change...and sometimes you don't know that you have changed until you get back home to your friends and family. I have had a lot of troubles this semester with teachers, students, and the weather, my photography and with life in general...but I survived and I had some amazing times and made some amazing memories. I will go back to Ireland.... but not for a while...

It has been a pleasure sharing in the journeys of my fellow J.Y.A.er's, and an inspiration. Each of you has done amazing things that you will be able to keep with you forever. Thank you for putting your every effort into getting the most out of your travels and the most from the cultures that surrounded you. I wish you all the best in your futures at home or abroad.

My message to all of you who followed my journey throughout: thank you for your support and I hope that you've not only learned some things, but have been inspired to see the world. Be inspired. Dream. Travel...in that order preferably.

Wish me luck here in Italy and in the rest of my travels around the world.

All the best,

Roger

I leave tomorrow...but not home like most of my fellow JYAer's....but to Italy. I fly into Rome tomorrow night, my first completely solo trip in another country...very scary. Of coarse everyone in my family is worried, if you know who they are, reasure them I'm going to be just fine. I can't wait to get there...the Forum, the Pantheon, the Colosseum, the Catacombs!!!

I'm happy that I finally broke the mold of my family...not to say the mold wasn't good to begin with....but it's a little different now. Before I started traveling there was no one in my family that would leave the country...we're too comfortable back home I guess. Hopefully I have started a trend amongst my brothers and father that will continue. I had this idea about the world while growing up that the world is just too big and that there's not enough time or money for me out there that will ever let me see anything other than my back yard. Living abroad for the second time has jus taken the world down in scale yet again. When I make it to China and Cape Town I'll probably feel as though I'm on one big playscape we call the world.

A little of background for you...you know that I'm a photography major...but I'm also an art history minor with my focus of studies on Greek and Roman Art...so you can imagine my excitement preparing for this trip. I'll check in with you from the road as soon as I hit a computer and I'll be sure to get some last minute pictures of Italy up for all of you.

Rog

We just had our Final Show here last night at the Burren College of Art. There was 28 students exhibiting work, food & wine, and a generous crowd that showed up. I displayed my new take on landscape with my bubbled images of Ireland countryside along side another artist and friend of mine in a gallery all our own. The Fahy's showed up as well as Bernadette Monks (the woman who cooked me the oysters in the last video...well not cooked....but served). It was a great turn out with many familiar and new faces to see and meet. Now that the show is over that means that the semester is on a countdown...7 days until departure...at least for everyone else. Everyone here will be leaving on the 16th of December while I will be spending the next two weeks doing some traveling...finally! I'm going to have the freedom to do whatever I want...I just have to choose a place to go...I'm thinking Italy for two weeks would be perfect, we'll see. Meanwhile I have to plan on finding a new place to live or at least keep my things while getting around and then anticipate the arrival of my father, girlfriend, twin brother, and friend of mine. I'm not as excited to leave this place as many of the other students...it's sad to leave such a beautiful place. Hopefully when my girlfriend gets here we will make it to all the places that I didn't have the time to get to during the semester...Belfast for one...

Meanwhile I have been just keeping to my work and really trying to get things in order for a departure in one way or another. I'll keep you posted, hopefully from Italy...

~Roger~

Ya know, the thing about myself that I'm most proud of...it's my ability to bounce back. In spite of the still persistent rain ensuing here, select other students, the cabin fever among my peers, and the stress of getting ready for our final show...I'm doing quite well.

So...the final show is coming up quite quickly...the semester has truly flown by. Lately I have been spending all hours of the day at school in the print lab or in the wood shop. I am working on this new format for a photograph for my final show...something I'm calling my "Bubble Landscapes". I have been doing my panoramas for quite some time and lately have grown bored with them...and so I wanted to create something new, something that I have never seen before...and so I sat in front of my computer and stared. I sat there for about two hours just flipping from image to image and then sitting back in my seat. It was one of the most horrible days of my life...(art-wise)...in my mind I was tearing my images apart. I hated them, I was angry at myself and at my inability to create something original that no one else could claim to have done...and so that's when I started to manipulate my images into these spheres...it's certainly not the most amazing thing that I've done, nor is it the most exciting new thing to hit the world of art...but it is most definitely the first thing that I have done that is entirely mine.

So we have 9 days till the show...5 until I must be done with all my work...I have some long days and night ahead of me here, but at least you all will get to see the show. I will be sure to post some of my work soon, both the new "Bubble Landscapes" as well as my Large Format Portraits...

All the Best,

Roger

Hope all is well in the world...as for Ireland...it's cold, wet and windy...apparently it rains here...

But seriously, we've been trapped indoors for days with this nonstop hurricane-like weather...sideways rain, hail or sleet every hour or two and oh...did I mention more flooding. I have no problem going out in the rain...but when your mode of transportation is a bike and the rain blows you over into lakes that form in your back yard...it gets tough...enough complaining.

I have been home a lot but I have also had the time to sit back and do some writing, listen to some new music and have some good conversations. I'd like to take you all into the world of an art school...for those of you on the outside...this is how I see it:

You all have that idea of an artist in your head...they are the free thinkers, the strange, the creative, the loud, the decorated, the innovative, the burned out, the hyper over-observers and the "deep"...sort of. I am living with 9 artists and studying with 38 from all over the states. Last year in Greece I lived with 17 other Americans who loved to have a good time, see new places and meet new faces...they looked at me as different (I think) and hopefully as an artist. I was the one who filled that specific role in the group and I loved it. Now here's the kicker...I'm in art school... in Ireland... I'm not nearly as comfortable as when I was in Greece and even less comfortable than when I'm in the states. I suppose that this is my first taste of what it's like to be in the real world with other artists...surrounded by a group of peers from all over the place with very different views of the world, the art world and of me. I no longer am the artist that I thought I was. Rather I find myself constantly trying to defend myself as an artist...and worse...I constantly have to convince myself that what I'm doing is valid...and that I'm valid in this context. I am learning about who I am here. I am learning about who I am here. I am also learning about how I work and why I do things that I do. Over these past 10 days since my last entry I have kind of fallen apart and pieced myself back together.

I'm having trouble saying what I want to say here...so here's a part from my journal...

"So some of the things I have to say about studying abroad. I would have to say that this trip has been, more than any other trip, a path to self discovery thorough conflict with others. I am in a art school with artists from all over the states. To begin with, artists are very opinionated and in most situations I find them to be very different types of people…with very different ways of thinking. I would count myself as a person who thinks differently as well…an artist in part of that mix. I however don’t fit into that category according to many…the artist category I mean. I am finding it very difficult to get along here in a group of artists. I am an entertainer…they are entertainers. We are all fighting for some type of spotlight…I have always tried to live in a spotlight…through any means possible. I will try to overachieve, stand out…speak out, look different., talk different., act different…I love being different….so what does one do when surrounded by people who are just like him and in their own ways very different themselves. I don’t know. I am no longer as important as I once was. At my home school I find that many of the artists have a sense of community with each other….not so much here….it’s more of a competition to see who can appear to be successful. Through many discussions with the student’s here I am finding out things about the world of art that I am tiptoeing around as well as finding out many things about the way I think. Last night Ryan brought up something interesting to me…why are we here…not like that though…why are we here in the Burren…the middle of nowhere where these matters of the art world are so far away they can’t touch us… sorry, let me get to the point. I came here to see Ireland…perhaps others in the group came here to leave wherever it was that they were…not to experience Ireland but to just simply get away…That thought never even crossed my mind…come to Ireland not just to see Ireland. They accuse me of being a hunter…one who goes out into the world hunting art…images rather…hunting my photographs and them in a true hunter fashion I prepare them and hang them on a wall as trophies….is that what I do? I don’t know. Is photography just an instant gratification thing for me…where I feel conquest for photographing more of the world than others…I know that I am so far behind that I may never catch up but I will try anyway….

I am a photographer because I love the world. I love to see the world and find the most beautiful things possible…

So study abroad. I am here to meet new people, see new things and improve my portfolio. My greatest concern here was to grow as a person…though of great importance…growing as an artist was not my main goal here. I want to develop as an artist…but I don’t feel that I am as interested in the same art world as the rest of them. I don’t want to be Du Champ. I don’t want to be Warhol…I want to be ME. I have a tremendous amount of pride for who I am and what it is that I do with my life. More directly…I am proud to be me. Studying abroad has afforded me the opportunity to truly realize that. Have I changed in these 3 months or have I just become more comfortable being me. The one thing, if I had to say, that changed in me is that I became more solid. I’m not sure if you understand that. But since I’ve been here I have been judged more than anyone else in the group. I have been victim to more criticism as a person than I have ever been in my entire life. I have been told how I must change, who I must read and who I should listen to…I’ve been told that I need to broaden my horizons…stop popping my collar…learn who’s hot in the art world and been told that I am a dick repeatedly for reasons they will not tell me but rather tell me to figure out on my own. At this very minute as I write this I have learned how to be who I am with confidence."

And if you're still reading...

This is a list of people that have affected who I am as a person...I found it important to make this for some reason and I would like to thank these people for helping me grow or become more aware of myself and the world...Thank You.

"People that have led me in the past…in order.

Dad – to be a hard working honest man
Justin – to be liked
Shawn – to be noble
Danny – to be prideful
Mom – to be more accepting and to listen
Richard Fahey – to be loud
Mary Carson – to be kinder, to love
Colin Mulcunry – to be funny
Kevin Osborne – to relax
Ian Bornarth – to focus
Ilias from Greece – to keep a room at attention, to make them constantly aware of my presence but at the same time have a softer side worthy and commanding of respect
John from Greece – to think about everything and to tell more stories
Alison Leary – to have fun and be comfortable being me, to love again

Which brings me to now...the more immediate now as in Ireland...

Candace – to be confrontational, sort of
Kevin Fendell – to question my intentions and find why I do things that I do
Ducan – to make me realize that I must depend more on myself"

I know that you all don't know any of these people but they are who make up me. Some of them had great impacts, some had quick but effectual ones. Some were teachers, friends, roomates, and brothers.

I find that the more I remove myself from being comfortable, the more I learn about myself....everyone should give it a try some time, it's worth it.

Roger

So as it turns out...I thought that the Burren was an inspirational place...wait till you see Killarney! It was the most amazing landscape I've ever seen...I also hitchhiked for the first time in my life...then hitched some more and more...

I got a ride out to the Dingle Peninsula, to the Gap of Dunloe, and I cycled throughout most of Killarney Park (it's immense!).

Something I'm really happy about,...this was my first solo trip. I got a ride down there with Laura and then went my own way. I never really travel on my own and so it was kind of scary to go out on my own for the first time. Every time I've traveled in the past there is either someone traveling along side with me or there is someone at my final destination waiting to receive me. So I found a hostel, rented a bike, made new friends and contacts for the future and really enjoyed being solo for once...I suppose that's a big part of studying abroad, learning independence.

Each night in the Hostel I had different roommates, always from another country...some were from France, Poland, and some from South Africa (Not to far from Durban, where JYA Lauren is doing her study abroad!)

It was definitely a place that needs further exploration and hopefully my schedule will allow me to go back at some point soon.

Best,

Roger

This kind of makes me think what I would be doing back home right now. If not for Arcadia University's Study Abroad Program, if not for the University of Hartford Art School, if not for NBC's Junior Year Abroad I would never have experienced all that I have. There are so many people out there that can help you if you just simply ask. You can go anywhere. You can do anything.

PS. I’ve cleaned my ears maybe 2 dozen times since I left that bog last Saturday…and bog is still coming out…not cool.

This first trip is a couple hours North in Connemara (you know that place by now)...but meanwhile I have also been planning my first solo trip. I considered London, Amsterdam, Belgium, Brussels and even Egypt....but found that those were not the right places for right now. I came all the way to Ireland to see Ireland,...simple I know, but it took me a few days to realize that. Sure being here affords opportunities for travel throughout other parts of Europe but I feel that I should explore my surroundings first. So, in conclusion I have decided that Egypt will happen in December....next week however will bring me to County Kerry to see the Skellig Islands and maybe even out to Cork to see Blarney Castle.

I'll keep you posted, wish me luck!

Rog

My final note. I want to thank the J.Y.A. Producer for coming up with this idea for the show, without it I don't think that any of us 10 would push ourselves so hard to be immersed culturally as we are now. Thank you.

Rog

One thing that I worried about before leaving for study abroad is that I would be trapped with just the American students, something they told us to be careful of doing. They encourage everyone to try and get out on their own and meet people but I've never really gone out on my own so much as I have been here....it's great.

Wish me luck with the rest of my project and make sure to catch the Fahy Episode!

Rog

Cheers for now,

Rog

Rog

On a separate note, school is going well. I am starting to develop all my negatives this week and finally start printing. My teacher, Martina, has been helping me not so much with the technical aspect of my work but rather with the reason behind my work. Up until this point I haven't really been thinking to deeply about why I do my photography. I haven't yet put together a cohesive group of images that I can justify as a "Series". I’ll keep up the work and show you all soon.

All that said I will have to say that things are changing in me, for the better...I know that being here now is the right thing for me.

I'll check back with you all soon,
Roger

To "Troy" who asked me how I compare photographing the fall foliage of Hartford to the landscape of Ireland I would have to say that it's important to do both. I will miss the fall foliage and will miss the winter snow of the Hartford area and New England...but it's worth leaving knowing that I can come back with an entirely new view of the world. I love the US. My girlfriend had this talk with me about traveling once. She said that one of the greatest things about being an American is having the freedom to travel the world and come back. I spoke about wanting to move to Greece one day and she later shared her thoughts; "it's not fair to leave the place that gave has given you the opportunity to leave it". The point is that America is my home and I will always love it there and want to photograph there. For now I want to bring the world back to America.

PS. Troy...there is a lot of overcast and rain and wind...but if I wait for the right time or see the right thing, photography is everywhere.

And one last note to some friends and teachers back home. To some friends about to embark on trips to Europe, best of luck and safe travels safe travels to you (take some pictures and email me). To those teachers following my journey through Ireland (Fermi High School & The Hartford Art School), thank you, it means so very much to me that you're still there...